Trevor Noah Doesn’t Trust At-Home Tests

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Awaiting a Delivery

Americans can now request free at-home Covid testing through a new Biden administration website that discreetly went up on Tuesday. The tests will be delivered to you in seven to twelve business days.

What a relief that testing will now be offered to everyone, but seven to 12 days? That’s a long time.” Trevor Noah made the statement. That seems a little excessive in the context of an outbreak of this magnitude. I mean, each and every day is valuable. In a pandemic, time is of the essence. Joe Biden, of all people, should be aware of this.

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Daily Show host Trevor Noah also addressed the White House’s new website offering free Covid tests: “just as soon as the Omicron wave is done.”

Although it is encouraging that diagnostic tools will soon be accessible to anyone, the estimated delay of seven to twelve days is a bit much to take into account. Do you not think that’s stretching things a bit?

Within the context of a pandemic? Every moment, after all, is priceless. In the event of a pandemic, every second counts, and Vice President Joe Biden is well aware of this.

And then Noah said, “I can’t help but think that if America just took a military approach to Covid, this testing situation would be solved [snap fingers]. Since the United States military never takes its sweet time. America says it doesn’t want nuclear weapons but then begins developing them. The United States always keeps bombs in reserve.

He continued, “No one is like, ‘OK, we can place the order now and then we wait seven to 12 days, unless there’s a holiday, in which case…’ if America wants to drone someone.”

The only thing I can say is bam! The terrorist has been eliminated, so you may rest easy. What? Is that all there was? Boom, they’re still not here! It’s my boom, and I’m not backing down from it.

We would have all gotten these tests months before Omicron even got here if America was that proactive about pandemics, he said. You certainly couldn’t put your faith in the average American to perform well on a test.

A joking “We’re just going to test ourselves for antigens?” he asked. “Do we do that before or after we botch the Easy Mac instructions?”